


The Triwizard Tournament

by StarStuff42



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-05-12 10:02:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5662249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarStuff42/pseuds/StarStuff42
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ginny notices that her boyfriend might have a bigger crush on his bff Seamus, so her and Pavarti plot to set the two up. In the process, three of them engage in a Triwizard Tournament if you know what I mean.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Triwizard Tournament

**Author's Note:**

> This piece goes out to my college Quidditch team.  
> I started it off seriously, but it descended into Crack Fic territory.  
> I'm so sorry.

The fire roared inside the Three Broomsticks, fogging up the windows where the toasty inn met the frigid winter air. Ginny looked up from her butterbeer and into the gorgeous brown eyes of her boyfriend. Or, she would have if he had been looking at her instead of over her shoulder.

“Over here” Ginny said with a snap of her fingers.

“Sorry” Dean said, eyes flashing with guilt before refocusing back on her.

“What do you keep looking at?” Ginny asked.

“Nothing, I’m just staring into space” Dean said quickly. Ginny looked over her shoulder and saw exactly what she expected to see. Seamus: or rather, Seamus and Pavarti sitting at a table across the room.

“So, how is Seamus?” Ginny said taking a sip of her butterbeer.

“Seamus is fine” Dean said quickly.

“Just fine?” Ginny said with one eyebrow raised.

“Umm yeah” Dean replied. They both took long sips of their butterbeer.

“Why are you so concerned about Seamus?” Dean said defensively.

“Because you keep staring at him!” Ginny said, exasperated.

“I do not” Dean replied, cheeks flushing.

“Oh come on Dean. You gaze at him during meals, in the common room, even during care for magical creatures!” Ginny said.

“Are you implying I have a…thing for Seamus?” Dean asked.

“Uh hu” Ginny said, sipping butterbeer with both eyebrows raised now.

“That’s insane, Seamus is my best mate, you know that” Dean responded.

“Your best mate who you want to date” Ginny said.

“I…suddenly I can’t look at my best friend in a super heterosexual not romantic at all way?” Dean asked.

“You don’t see me looking at Luna that way. You look at him the way Kirk looks at Spock” Ginny responded.

“Who?” Dean asked.

“Oh, it’s from a muggle show I watched with Hermione, they’re super into each other but won’t admit it.”

Dean shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

“Look, I want you to know there’s absolutely nothing wrong with fancying a guy like Seamus. I’m not mad at all, he’s really cute” Ginny said, softening her tone a bit. Dean gave an uncertain smile that told Ginny she hit the nail on the head.

 

…

 

“You fancy _whom?_ ” Pavarti said, voice raised with forced surprise.

“Not so loud, do you want the whole pub to know” Seamus responded in a hushed whisper.

“Sorry. I just absolutely never would have expected that. Have you told him yet?” Pavarti replied.

“No, of course not, he has a girlfriend. I just had to tell somebody that I trusted, you know? Get it off my chest” Seamus said.

“He flirts with you all the time, you really should do something” Pavarti said.

“And say what?” Seamus asked.

“Be honest, what’s the worst thing that could happen?” Pavarti replied.

“I could lose by best friend in the whole world!” Seamus said.

“But what if he feels the same? You will regret this your whole life if you say nothing now” Pavarti said.

“Oh god, I know you’re right, but I don’t know what to do” Seamus said. Before Pavarti could think up a suitable course of action, Ginny strode over to their table.

“Hi guys,” Ginny said, “how’s it going?”

“You know, it’s going” Seamus said, worried that she had somehow overheard their previous conversation.

“Can I talk to Seamus for a minute?” Ginny asked, and Seamus got up to follow her over to the bar, where they both took a seat and ordered more butterbeer.

“So, are you and Pavarti…” Ginny asked with a wink and an elbow nudge.

“Ahh, no, just friends” Seamus responded.

“Okay good. Do you want to join have a threesome with Dean and I?” Ginny asked. Seamus spit out his mouthful of butterbeer.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Threesome, manage a trios, Triwizard Tournament…sex” Ginny said very seriously. Seamus’s face was flushed more red than the Gryffindor scarf draped around his neck.

“I don’t know” Seamus said.

“Oh please?” Ginny said seductively, “I’d be really into that, and I know that Dean would be really…really into it.”

“Dean would be…really into it?” Seamus asked, voice an octave higher than usual.

“Uh hu, he’s been begging me to try it out for weeks now” Ginny said.

“It might be best if you asked a different guy, maybe Harry would be more up to the task” Seamus said.

“No. It has to be you” Ginny responded firmly.

“Um. Alright then. When is this thing going to happen?” Seamus asked.

“Tonight” Ginny responded confidently.

“Okay” was all Seamus could say before Ginny strode away. He stole a quick glance over at Dean, who had disappeared during his conversation with Ginny. That butterbeer might as well have been Felix Felicis because Seamus was getting lucky that night.

 

…

 

“Okay, so, how are we supposed to do this?” Dean asked uncertainly when it was finally just him, Ginny, and Seamus alone in the dorm the two men shared. Ron, Harry, and Neville were off visiting Hagrid with Pavarti, who seemed to conveniently know that the dorm needed to remain empty.

“How about you two undress each other?” Ginny said, sitting down on the bed. Dean gulped loudly, but stepped forward and began to loosen Seamus’s tie. It fell to the floor, and Dean began working quickly on the buttons of Seamus’s shirt.

“Not so fast” Ginny said, “Take your time with it. Be sensual.” Dean slowed down but stayed just as awkward.

“No no no. Like this” Ginny said as she grabbed Seamus and pulled him toward her. She unbuttoned his next button and pulled his shirt away, kissing down his chest, pausing to give extra attention to his nipple.

“Now you try,” She said, giving Seamus back to Dean. Seamus undid Dean’s shirt now trying to follow Ginny’s advice. Ginny noticed Dean’s pants looking particularly tight as Seamus kissed down his chest and made it to the waistband of his pants. Seamus stopped and stood up.

“No, what are you doing? Keep going!” Ginny said.

“Keep going?” Seamus asked.

Ginny rolled her eyes at both clueless guys and pulled them both over to the bed.

_*I can’t take this seriously anymore. I’m so sorry*_

They engaged in the triwizard tournament. Dean explored Ginny’s chamber of secrets, while Seamus attended to Dean’s Basilisk. Seamus’s half blood prince was quickly becoming full blood, and stood at attention like someone had cast petrificus totalus. Ginny reached down to play with Seamus’s Sorcerer’s Stones. Forget 69, they were turning to page 394 in the restricted section.

Dean untangled his hands from Seamus’s hair and ran them down his back as Seamus mounted him like a hippogriff, and Dean bucked his hips like Buckbeak. Seamus leaned forward until he was an inch from Dean’s face, and Dean closed the distance in a non-Dementor’s kiss. Their tongues played wizard’s chess for dominance.

Seamus left Dean’s mouth and began kissing down his neck, while Dean leaned in to whisper “I solemnly swear that I’m up to no good” in Seamus’s ear before nibbling on his earlobe. Dean and Seamus continued to rub their wands together, guided by their hands

“Seamus, I’m going to S.P.E.W” Dean cried as Seamus continued to rub against him.

“Accio Dean” Seamus said as Dean came for him with a moan louder than Myrtle. Seamus followed closely behind, expectoing his patronum with a final stroke of Dean’s hand.

“Mischief Managed” Seamus said with a content sigh as he collapsed next to Dean.

“It’s like I’m looking into the mirror of Erised, cause that’s exactly what I wanted” Dean said smoothly as Seamus snuggled up and entangled their legs like Devil’s Snare. They lay like that for several long minutes, breathing synchronized. Seamus removed his head from the crook of Dean’s neck and looked around the room.

“Ginny?” He said, receiving no answer from the empty dorm room.

“When did she leave?” Seamus asked Dean.

“I have no idea” Dean said, “I didn’t notice anyone but you.” Seamus, still flushed, turned an even darker shade of red.

“Come on, we should probably get ourselves tidied up before the guys come back” Seamus said, detangling himself from Dean. Seamus began pulling on Pajama bottoms while Dean picked up the hastily discarded clothes from the floor.

“You’re going to want to do something about that hair” Dean said with a smirk, pointing at Seamus’s mussed up hair.

“Yeah, well you’re going to want to do something about that neck” Seamus replied, pointing to Dean’s hickey-covered skin. After getting tidied up, they made sure that the room was free from any evidence of an orgy.

“Oh, I left my book bag down in the common room. I’ll be right back” Dean said as he headed down the stairs from the boy’s dormitory.

To his surprise, practically all of Gryffindor house was sitting in the common room. To his horror, they all greeted him with cheers and applause. Harry, Ron, Hermione, Pavarti, Ginny, Neville, and worst of all Hagrid were sitting around a cake that read ‘Congrats on the Sex’.

“Was it passionate, deliberate, and great for the both of you?!?” Pavarti asked excitedly.

“Did you all set this up?” Dean asked, mortified. In response everyone just cheered again, and there was much rejoicing. Yaaaaaaay.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry.


End file.
